The biggest mistake that you could possibly make is to confront your spouse before you have done an investigation and/or have proof of the affair that they cannot deny. In no way should you let your spouse no that you are suspicious. He/she is already being secretive and hiding the truth from you. If you tip them off it will make it harder to find the truth.

If you think about it, when you ask them directly, they have no choice but to deny it. They will rightfully deny it if they are being faithfull. If your suspicions are correct, but they want to save the relationship, they will lie because they don’t want the relationship to end. If they are cheating on you and they plan on leaving, our experience tells us that they will lie to you until the very last minute for one of two reasons, the person they want to be with is not 110% committed to be with them indefinitely or they feel that they cannot get divorced due to monetary or religious concerns. In short, there is almost no opportunity for the truth to come out on it’s own and if it does, the timing is completely controlled by your unfaithful spouse.

The bottom line is that if he/she knows that you are onto them they will go to even greater lengths to cover their tracks, making it even more difficult for you to find out the truth.

Please read my free course on how to catch a cheating spouse

If you would like to use a more “high tech” approach such as spy cameras or GPS trackers please visit an online spy store.

The first thing that you should do is keep a detailed record of reported activities of your partner or spouse. Write down the times, dates, places, other people involved, excuses given, etc. The notes that you take will be indespensable to you when comparing what is told to you with ATM receipts, telephone bills statements etc. A cheating partner is likely to change his or her story, and if confronted will most likely question your memory, so keeping a detailed record of everything is extremely important.

Keep track of all incoming phone calls. Record the time and number of all calls.

Go through the trash, his or her wallet, purse, pockets etc. when they are not around. If your partner is going to restaurants, bars, movies or anywhere else with their suspected lover there will be receipts and they will surely want to get rid of them. Chances are that they will get reckless and throw them in the trash or hide them in the car. If you find anything that you are suspicious of or cannot explain save it as evidence or write down the details and put the receipt back where you found it so that he/she does not get suspicious. Your partner is already being secretive so do not let them know that you are suspicious of them or they will go to even greater lengths to cover their tracks.

Plan a surprise visit to work, or come home at unexpected times, or tell your partner that you have to work late, but then come home early, etc..

Keep track of your partner’s mileage, receipts, credit card statements, atm withdrawals (unaccounted for cash), phone records, etc.

If you can, check your Partner’s call log. Look for phone numbers with an unusual number of calls. Keep in mind that cheating spouses often store their lover’s phone number under someone else’s name (a friend, a co-worker, etc.).

Unless you have enough evidence to make your case you should never confront your spouse. And never reveal all of your evidence at once. Many cheatering spouses will try to make up a story that fits with the evidence that they know about. But, if you withhold some evidence, and let your spouse/partner create a story, it gives you the opportunity to use the remaining evidence as leverage. By strategically withholding evidence, your spouse will start to question exactly how much you know, increasing the chance that he or she will tell the truth.

If you find anything suspicious, do not confront your spouse until you’re certain that you have enough evidence to get a confession or you are satisfied in your mind as to what is going on.

Think for a minute about how your partner might try to dismiss your accusations (we were just joking around, I was just flirting, it was a misunderstanding, we are just friends, nothing happened, etc.). If you can anticipate how your partner is likely to respond, you can try to gather the evidence you need to counter what he or she says.

The main thing to remember is to save everything, take meticulous notes and be diligent in your investigation.

For more information on how to catch a cheating spouse please read my free e book Proven Methods To Catch A Cheating Spouse

Many people think that it is necessary to hire a private investigator (costing thousands of dollars) when you want to know where someone is spending their time. However, if you are willing to put modern technology to work for you can find out the same information without the huge expense of hiring a P.I.

It is now possible to track someone using a small GPS tracking device that uses military satellites to find someone’s location to within feet of there actual position. Basically there are two types of trackers.

GPS Logger – Think of a logging device as a sort of video recorder that records the locations, speed traveled, time spent at locations and so on. The GPS logging device is extremely helpful if you need to know where your spouse has been spending their time. For verification of your spouse’s whereabouts this is a very useful tool. For example your partner is spending time at someone’s house or meeting them at a motel, or says that he/she is working late, with the logger you will know exactly where he/she has been and for how long. This device is very small and totally self contained.

I have used many different models and the most reliable and easiest to use is the Professional Mini Tracker.

Simply place the GPS tracker in or on the target vehicle using the magnetic mount. When you are ready to view the information you take it off or out of the vehicle and connect it to a USB port on your computer to download the information. The locations and routes that the vehicle took can then be viewed on a map, a satellite image or in text format. You can save the files on your computer, CD or zip drive to use as evidence at a later date.

If you want to have the ability to know where they are in real time without removing the device from the vehicle you will need to go with a real time GPS tracker. Keep an eye out for a coming article on real time GPS trackers.